Top Regrets of the Dying: What People Wish They Did Differently

13 Most Common Deathbed Regrets (And What We Can Learn From Them)

There’s no one right way to live a life — but there are certain truths that tend to surface only when it’s too late to act on them.

As a death educator, I’ve spent years working in hospice, with grieving families, in counselling rooms, and at the bedside. Over and over again, I’ve heard the same regrets rise to the surface in people’s final moments.

This post brings together the most common regrets expressed at the end of life — not to scare you, but to offer you the chance to reflect now, while time is still on your side.

1. Not Living a Life True to Themselves

Many people realized they had lived for others — following expectations, avoiding risk, and silencing their true desires. The pain wasn’t just about what they did, but about everything they didn’t do.

2. Working Too Much

Especially among older generations, there was deep sadness about missed time with children, partners, and loved ones. Work had been an escape — but it came at a high cost.

3. Not Expressing Their Feelings

Bottling things up felt safer in the moment, but created distance, resentment, and lost connection. At the end, people wished they’d said what mattered — love, apologies, boundaries, truth.

4. Losing Touch With Friends

Old friends faded away as life got busy. But in the end, people longed for that laughter, warmth, and shared history. They regretted not reaching out while they still could.

5. Not Allowing Themselves to Be Happier

Happiness wasn’t something they gave themselves permission for. Many stayed stuck in roles, mindsets, or relationships that kept them small. Joy had felt frivolous — until it was gone.

6. Not Being More Loving

Simple acts of love — saying “I love you,” being present, showing gentleness — were often overlooked. Near the end, those missed moments felt enormous.

7. Not Being a Better Spouse, Parent, or Child

Family dynamics are complicated, but many regretted not investing more in those core relationships. Gratitude, forgiveness, and connection came into focus only when time ran out.

8. Not Taking More Risks

Fear kept people small. They played it safe, stuck with the known, and missed out on the adventure of really living. Regret often centred on the roads not taken.

9. Worrying Too Much

So much time was lost to anxiety — about things that didn’t matter, or never even happened. People wished they’d trusted more, laughed more, and let go sooner.

10. Not Living Their Dream

Whether it was writing a book, travelling, starting a business, or living differently — many admitted they didn’t even try. Fear of judgment or failure held them back.

11. Not Taking Care of Their Health

The body was taken for granted — until it wasn’t. Many wondered if they’d feel better, or live longer, if they’d taken more care. But more than that, they regretted not enjoying their wellness while they had it.

12. Not Doing More for Others

Legacy mattered. People wished they’d lived with more compassion, generosity, and impact — not to be remembered, but to feel like their life had meant something.

13. Not Choosing More Meaningful Work

Security took priority over purpose. But near the end, paychecks didn’t matter — meaning did. Many wished they’d done work that truly reflected who they were.

A Final Thought

It’ll be interesting to see if these regrets evolve over time — as generations change, values shift, and priorities realign. But for now, this is what we hear most often from those who know their time is short.

Let it be a gentle reminder to zoom out — look at the bigger picture of your life. Step away from the trivial, and move toward what really matters.

Live while you can. Love while you can.

And try, just maybe, to leave with fewer regrets.

Want to go deeper?

👉 Download the full Ebook: 13 Most Common Deathbed Regrets